Monday, 18 July 2016
FIFTEEN THINGS TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
Have you ever felt like you are not living, you are just not dying? Well here are fifteen things that will definitely motivate you to wake up on that second Monday of the week;
1. Dance in the rain
Remember those with kinky hair, carry a blow-dry. Us blacks we have to stick together.
2. Be part of a television audience
Now that Oprah and Tyra Banks abandoned us, we need to move on to the next black woman; thank you Steve Harvey.
3. Participate in a flash mob
Who doesn’t want to dance in a clique at Tom Mboya Street? Straight Outa Tom Mboya.
4. Eat in an underwater restaurant
The idea of a fish swimming over my head while its brother is fresh off the fire is simply fascinating. Or witnessing the chain of predators trickling from shark to human to lobster to crabs and only one of them is gaining.
5. Experience zero gravity
I want to fly and still go for a walk afterwards.
6. Make a snow angel
Snow globes are my ultimate fetish, Phantom Rolls Royce unto the one who wins me one. Psyche. I can only wait to experience my own version of an angel.
7. Bathe in milk
I want milk in its truest form, not talking about Mursik, Chepngetich.
8. Add a lock to the Love Lock Bridge in Paris.
If money finds me before love, I sure will travel across the continent with a Tricycle padlock. May cost less than my plane ticket but mean more than the ‘bae’ I never had. Chuckles.
9. Explore a shipwreck
Something about water and those who belong to Pisces I can’t wrap my arms around.
10. Build an igloo
You Might get frost bites but at least you won’t have to pay rent. God bless ice.
11. Donate blood
12. Go for a private nude photo-shoot
It will pay off when you are seventy and you haven’t seen your toes in a while.
13. Reach the top of the Eiffel tower
Then jump off.
Please don’t, not until you put the view on Snap Chat.
14. Ride an elephant
Don’t be scared at least they are just the largest mammals on land. Be scared because they are the largest mammals on land.
15. Live happily ever after
You owe yourself nothing more than all the fulfilment that life has to give. Whether it comes in large sums or small lump sums, happiness should be the ultimate goal.
The world is too large, it would be a tragic if you live like you are in a matchbox; go dance in the rain and fall outside Robpol.